20 Unwritten Truths of Thanksgiving Dinner

ENID, OK - Every family has a set of unwritten truths when it comes to Thanksgiving dinners. Here are a few I've gathered from almost 60 years of holiday family meals.

1) Every kid must sit at the card table or short table at least once as a rite of passage.

2) You'll have absolutely nothing to talk about the first year you sit at the adult table.

3) There will be a prayer before the meal and you may have to hold someone's hand.

4) One child will pile a plate with five pounds of food and will only take two bites.

5) Someone will mention that they are eating too fast, and they need to slow down.

6) Be ready to hug people you barely know. Coming and going.

7) A new guest will hear a Thanksgiving tale that's been told over a million times.

8) No matter where you sit you'll inevitably be by the left handed family member.

9) Someone will tell you to go back for seconds, as soon as your plate is clean.

10) You must eat cranberry sauce. Don't ask, it's Thanksgiving, just eat it.

11) Expect an awkward silence when everyone is eating. Enjoy it, it won't last.

12) It's leftovers for supper. Turkey sandwiches. Want something different? Starve.

13) The family touch football game will always turn into tackle. Dress appropriately.

14) Canned black olives are an appetizer. Eat them and stay away from the turkey.

15) The most liberal and conservative at the table will start a political argument.

16) A dish or item will be forgotten in the oven or freezer until the after meal is over.

17) At least one uncle will disappear to the bathroom for forty-five minutes.

18) Ten hours to cook, twenty minutes to consume, two hours to clean up.

19) You won't be able to eat one more bite without exploding. Until dessert.

20) The TV will be on and the Detroit Lions will be playing football.

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